I was in a relationship with a Police Officer who became violent after the birth of our child. Looking back with more mature eyes, I can now recognise coercive control from the very start; but younger me did not. He first punched me hard in the back, between my shoulder blades while I was sat on the edge of our bed breastfeeding our child. I told him that if he ever laid a finger on either of us again I would report him. A few weeks later he tried to strangle me and punched me in the face.

He told me not to bother reporting him, and I can still recall what he said. « The beauty of domestic violence is, it’s your word against mine. You’re a nobody, I am a Police Officer. Who do you think they’re going to believe? » He was right of course, they did absolutely nothing. Several years later, I got a call off his new partner. She had sold her home to fund a move to another country. He was still employed as a police officer. He had put her in hospital and emptied their joint account. She wanted me to help her with a statement as she was trying to get her money back. I made the statement. Internal standards at his new force liaised with internal standards at the UK force. My complaint, and the complaint of at least one other woman against him had disappeared. No records could be found. I could remember the name of the Officer who took my statement and he confirmed that he remembered me. Nothing on his records at all. Police apologised to me and said although they looked corrupt, they could assure me that they were not.

Constabulary: Cheshire Constabulary

Timespan: Two decades ago

Did you report it to the police?: Yes

Your ethnicity: White British

Have you experienced suicidality due to this?: No

Are you disabled as defined under the Equality Act 2010?: No

Illustration by Danny Noble

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