Amelia | Policeman found me off a dating website

I was on a dating website and exchanged a few messages on the site with a man – nothing v deep or personal and I didn’t think we had any spark and the emails petered out. Months later I received a whatsapp from an unknown number – it was him. I hadn’t given him my number. I hadn’t disclosed any personal info apart from my first name and approx location – a big city outside London. I logged into the dating site on a hidden profile to look at his profile and he was still online and I hadn’t realised when first chatting to him on the site he was a policeman. It was listed on his profile. I replied to his email and said sorry I didn’t think we exchanged personal details or numbers, and he said “oh didn’t we? Oh well I must have looked you up” and I said – well how would you do that and he replied “perks of the job”
I was horrified and blocked him immediately – I know it sounds dramatic but I felt very vulnerable and exposed – that he had somehow accessed personal information about me and knew where I lived? It was very unnerving and I did wonder if he might turn up in person. Luckily I was already moving house shortly after that into a shared place so it made me feel slightly safer. I am extremely cautious online dating now. I would never knowingly date a policeman either!

Constabulary: Metropolitan Police Service

Timespan: approx 5 years ago

Did you report it to the police?: No

Your ethnicity: White British


illustration by Danny Noble

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